Wednesday, August 29, 2012

It's C*ntagious


(Pay attention at the 15 second mark!)

My Mom once told me that when I was little, one of my favorite phrases, was "Mother F*ckers".  Combining the warm, loving title of the woman who birthed me with a less than couth synonym for what my parents could have been called while conceiving me apparently did not sit well in certain social settings.

Being the eldest grandchild on my Dad's side of the family in which I only had Uncles, who were in their late teens or early 20's during my childhood, you can imagine that I developed a well versed, swear word laden vocabulary at an early age.

Moving to the teen years, my Mom would beg my brother, Joe and I not to cuss.  We would drop F bombs like no tomorrow but one day, when my Mom offered us cash to quit, we stopped cold turkey.  Joe, lacking willpower and the inability to avoid situations in which b*tch and sh*t are not commonly used words, failed within 2 hours.  I, however,  held on for two whole years! Not one crude word was uttered from my mouth during that time.  I became the King of saying, "heck", "darn" and "oh, shoot!"  In other words, I was miserable.


(There is something greatly satisfying about a well placed ^%&$.)

Now, as a full grown adult, I have ventured back to the land of cussing.  It releases frustration, anger and gosh darn it, sometimes it's just fun!  But, the one word that had always remained off limits was the elusive and oft-hated C-word.  No, not copulation, chlamydia or coccyx but rather the super bad one.  You know it. The word that is so crass that if it rattles off of your tongue, your Great Aunt Dottie Mae would somehow arrive with a purse full of bricks and knock you over the head so hard that you'd be bruised longer than Chris Brown's career.

But, I'll have you know that all of the ceased with I moved to Australia.  While still socially impolite, c*nt has a charm here that is uniquely Australian.  Sometimes, people say it so nonchalantly and lovingly that you don't even realize that they are your friend until they have referred to you as that word. It is truly heart warming.


(Clockwise Emotions: "Ouch, I can't believe that I said it!" - "Wait, did I say it?" - "Ahh, who cares?!" - "I am so sorry, Grandma!")

With that said, tonight on television in Australia, history was made.  A lovely television presenter named Carrie Bickmore, one of the hosts of Channel Ten's - "The Project", innocently and accidentally stumbled over that colorful word, sort of.

Gingerly crafting a new c*nt hybrid, she combined the name of Australia's National Airline Carrier, Qantas with the word "customers".  In that moment, she bestowed upon the world, C*ntas!

As the new word bungee jumped from of her mouth, I had never felt more pride.  I quickly signed up to become a member of the C*ntas Frequent Flyer Program and I can't wait to be welcomed into the fold. I do, however, have a strange feeling that the flights will no longer serve warm nuts.  But, I'm excited for this new venture because if Qantas is known as the "flying kangaroo", I can't wait to fly, C*ntas - the "flying carpet"!

To sum up my emotions towards this event and the talented Carrie Bickmore, I have written a poem to delicately express the joy that ran through my veins on this momentous, Australian evening.  Well done, Ms. Bickmore, well done!


(The new Australian Idol)

Carrie On 


In from the gym, I flicked on the screen,
My mouth fell agape, when you said what you didn't mean,

Past your lips, a frightful word did slip,
I guess we now know, which airline ruined your last trip...

I choked on my laughter and quickly wrote a status update,
You made your stance pretty clear when it comes to airline price rates...

Now, I'm not sure if Channel Ten has lost a corporate sponsor yet,
But I think we'll all know when you can't board that Qantas jet...

So, don't worry Ms. B, you can always ride a Virgin, 
or make a pun of that too,
But saying the C-word on national tv,  Carrie,
has just made a legend out of you...

With a smile on my face, I must be blunt,
But a lackluster Wednesday ended, the moment you said c*nt!

Thank you!

"Like" me on Facebook and Follow me on Twitter!



19 comments:

Mumbles said...

As much as it pains my friends (and my teenage son), this is probably my favorite swear. While I have long mastered the socially acceptable outbursts (Oh, SHOOT! Dang it! Goodness!), fact is, I have the foulest mouth of any human I have ever encountered. And I love the living daylights out of this word. Probably because, by embracing it, I've robbed it of any sting. Plus, it's very fun to throw out there and see the eyes widen and the jaws drop. It's just a word to me--a collection of letters that sometimes perfectly fit the occasion. I recommend a season or two of "Deadwood" for folks who struggle with it.

Or a stint in Australia ;-)

I am really enjoying! I'll stop commenting now, before I start coming across as a freak stalker.

Kris

- Edmund - said...

Swear words are our friends haha Nothing beats a good F bomb when you really need it haha

Anonymous said...

That running watches can be water-proof to help you 100 Hublot Copy Running watches metres. hublot replica And even each individual type is fixed to help you 88 pieces community huge. The cost should really be exceptionally sizeable marketed the upper expensive grade? replica omega The standard mannequin contains foot orthotics own rotating, possible choices Breitling $ 40 . 00 9 decades good quality mobility, an important 44 60 minutes electric power preserve, it is water-proof to help you 50 metres. fake hublot There may be a "Gold" style of that Cockpit which can be rating to somewhat of a thousand metres designed for liquid prevention. cartier replica The standard category contains foot orthotics own rotating, potential Breitling forty-nine good quality move, an important 44 60 minutes electric power preserve, it is water-proof to help you twenty metres. replica omega You will find a "Gold" adaptation with the Cockpit which can be rating to just one thousand metres designed for liquid prevention.

swiss replica watches said...

Edmond Jaeger made an awesome ultra-thin score, and your dog inhibited Swiss watchmakers in making these. It absolutely was Jacques-David LeCoultre, Antoine's son, whom required the dispute and prevailed. Your LeCoultres contributed replica Gucci watches their astonishing view building art competence, even while Jaeger, an awesome developer, provided her / his combined step shows a groundbreaking fashion that is certainly the unshakable Jaeger-LeCoultre labeled. This precise alliance gifted climb to some of horological special, and as well in 1937 your Jaeger-LeCoultre unit themselves. Each independently coupled with replica Balenciaga Classic handbags jointly the above replica audemars piguet royal oak offshore watches adult gentlemen forged groups by combining adequately well-known makers involving luxury swiss wrist watches. Via 1902, and after that for replica audemars piguet millenary watches UK quite a few thirty ages then, LeCoultre replica chanel handbags & Cie made view movements to get Patek Philippe with Geneva. Ahead with Jaeger and LeCoultre began working along, Jaeger now experienced between his clientele this renowned creator Cartier.

Guo Guo said...

coach outlet store online
moncler jackets
michael kors outlet online
ralph lauren sale
michael kors outlet
canada goose sale
timberland outlet
tory burch outlet
celine bags
michael kors handbags
abercrombie store
abercrombie & fitch
abercrombie outlet
coach factory outlet
fitflop
ralph lauren outlet
hollister kids
michael kors
chi hair strighteners
michael kors purses
kate spade
coach outlet
wholesale nfl jerseys
burberry sale
ray ban glasses
bottega veneta bags
ugg boots
michael kors outlet
ugg outlet
polo ralph lauren online
marc jacobs outlet
gucci handbags
louis vuitton outlet
discount oakley sunglasses
p90x
abercrombie and fitch
replica rolex watches
hollister clothing store
kevin durant shoes 2014
ray ban outlet

Da Shuai Guo said...

3guowenhao0824
gucci outlet
pittsburgh steelers jersey
links of london uk
jordan 11
michael kors uk
kobe 9
ray ban sunglasses, http://www.ray-bansunglassess.in.net
timberland boots
lebron james shoes
calvin klein outlet
coach outlet
polo ralph lauren outlet
ray ban sunglasses online
polo lacoste pas cher
nike trainers
miami heat jersey
ray ban sunglasses
michael kors canada, http://www.michaelkorsoutletcanada.in.net
dansko outlet
louis vuitton
cheap mlb jerseys
new york giants jerseys
louis vuitton outlet store
ralph lauren uk
supra shoes
green bay packers jerseys
mac makeup
beats by dre
replica watches
ugg boots, http://www.uggboot.com.co

Mu Lin said...

louis vuitton zippy wallet
gucci purses
birkin bag hermes
cheap michael kors purses
coach outlet store
gucci outlet online
burberry purses
chanel bags outlet
burberry wallets
burberry bags
burberry handbags
burberry tote
gucci bags
hermes birkin
cheap coach purses
cheap gucci belts
coach tote bags
chanel bags prices
chanel wallet on a chain
michael kors bags on sale
michael kors cluthch
gucci clutch
hermes handbags
chanel clutch bag
longchamp bags
coach handbags sale
louis vuitton shoulder bag
gucci handbags
mcm purses
gucci bag
coach outlet store online
louis vuitton travel bag
louis vuitton watllets
coach crossbody
coach purse outlet

Wenhao Guo said...

swarovski outlet
tods shoes
mont blanc
coach outlet online
ray ban sale
cheap oakley sunglasses
ray-ban sunglasses
miami dolphins
oakley sunglasses cheap
tods shoes,tods shoes sale,tods sale,tods outlet online,tods outlet store,tods factory outlet
michael kors outlet store
cheap jordans
oakley sunglasses wholesale
louis vuitton outlet online
soccer jerseys,cheap soccer jerseys,cheap soccer jerseys for sale,soccer jersey,usa soccer jersey,football jerseys
nike free run uk
michael kors,michael kors canada,michael kors handbags,michael kors outlet,michael kors outlet canada
mulberry,mulberry handbags,mulberry outlet,mulberry bags,mulberry uk
the north face jackets
cheap uggs
jordan shoes
polo ralph lauren outlet
hermes belt for men
snapback hats
babyliss outlet
new york jets
mizuno shoes
michael kors factory sale
michael kors handbags wholesale
ralph lauren,ralph lauren uk,ralph lauren outlet,ralph lauren outlet online,polo ralph lauren outlet,ralph lauren polo
tiffany jewelry
chanel handbags
ddddddddd1104

chenlina said...

chenlina20151211
hollister co
michael kors outlet clearance
air jordans
abercrombie
michael kors outlet online
louis vuitton handbags
chanel handbags
michael kors outlet online
kevin durant basketball shoes
hollister co,hollister jeans,hollister.com,hollister ca
ugg boots outlet
abercrombie fitch
kate spade handbags
tory burch outlet
coach outlet store online
adidas originals
running shoes
oakley sunglasses cheap
celine outlet
canada goose outlet
cheap oakley sunglasses
ugg boots on sale
michael kors uk
true religion jeans outlet
coach factory outlet
ugg boots
cheap oakley sunglasses
abercrombie kids
cheap jordans
coach outlet
burberry outlet
louboutin pas cher
louis vuitton
uggs boots
coach outlet store online
prada handbags
replica watches
oakley sunglasses cheap
polo ralph lauren
jordan retro
as

chenlina said...

chenlina20160220
christian louboutin outlet
christian louboutin shoes
jordan retro
chanel handbags
jordan 11 concord
tods shoes
michael kors outlet
ugg outlet
ugg boots
nike free runs
louis vuitton
uggs outlet
cheap jordan shoes
true religion outlet
ray bans
mulberry handbags
michael kors outlet
nike trainers uk
ugg boots sale
kobe bryant shoes
uggs outlet
mihchael kors outlet online
michael kors outlet online
louis vuitton purses
cheap oakley sunglasses
chanel bags
ralph lauren outlet
polo ralph lauren
replica watches
louis vuitton outlet
toms shoes
ralph lauren uk
adidas originals
coach outlet store online
louis vuitton
ralph lauren outlet
michael kors outlet
abercrombie and fitch
air max uk
celine outlet
as

chenlina said...

chenlina2016507
ray ban sunglasses
oakley sunglasses
nike sb
longchamp bags
nike air max 90
ralph lauren outlet
ray ban sunglasses
oakley sunglasses
coach factory outlet online
michael kors handbags
true religion
north face outlet
tory burch outlet
michael kors outlet
tod's shoes
burberry outlet
cheap jordan shoes
coach outlet
coach factory outlet online
coach factory outlet
louis vuitton
louis vuitton outlet stores
timberland outlet
oakley sunglasses
christian louboutin shoes
michael kors handbags
air huarache
ray ban sunglasses outlet
louis vuitton outlet
michael kors outlet
ray ban sunglasses
supra sneakers
true religion jeans
kobe 9
louis vuitton outlet
kate spade outlet
louis vuitton outlet
michael kors handbags
kate spade handbags
michael kors outlet
as

Gege Dai said...

ralph lauren pas cher
ghd uk
cartier outlet store
ferragamo shoes
ray-ban sunglasses
tiffany and co
cheap oakley sunglasses
ferragamo shoes
ralph lauren outlet
coach outlet
lululemon outlet online
coach outlet
links of london jewellery
oakley sunglasses
tiffany and co
fitflops clearance
christian louboutin outlet
nike blazer pas cher
michael kors uk
louis vuitton sunglasses for women
soccer jerseys wholesale
snapbacks wholesale
mulberry outlet
coach outlet store
louis vuitton outlet
ray-ban sunglasses
michael kors canada
links of london
reebok outlet store
coach outlet store
nike air huarache
rolex watches
true religion uk outlet
lacoste shirts
swarovski crystal
chanyuan0604

xumeiqing said...

201606521meiqing
timberland outlet
converse uk
michael kors outlet clearance
louboutin pas cher
michael kors outlet
cheap mlb jerseys
discount nike shoes
pandora charms
michael kors watches
rolex watches
rolex replica watches
timberland boots
christian louboutin
ralph lauren outlet
true religion jeans
adidas nmd runner
the north face
ray ban sunglasses discount
coach outlet
cheap jordans
coach factory outlet
oakley sunglasses
kobe 9
lacoste shoes
nike trainers
adidas nmd
gucci borse
the north face
fake oakleys outlet
louis vuitton bags
cheap jordans
louis vuitton factory outlet
armani exchange
longchamp handbag
coach purses
asics shoes
adidas gazelle

Gege Dai said...

coach outlet online
ralph lauren outlet
oakley sunglasses
oakley sunglasses
lebron james shoes
longchamp pliage
chaussure louboutin
louis vuitton handbags
michael kors outlet
polo ralph lauren
tods shoes sale
lululemon outlet online
cheap jordan shoes
moncler jackets
mbt shoes
the north face outlet
versace sunglasses on sale
puma outlet
chrome hearts sunglasses
michael kors handbags
reebok outlet store
tory burch outlet online
ugg boots clearance
tiffany jewellery
bottega veneta outlet online
moncler coats
mulberry bags
burberry outlet
mont blanc pens
true religion outlet
coach outlet store
coach outlet
prada sneakers
ed hardy clothing
ralph lauren outlet
michael kors outlet
ugg boots clearance
0808jianxiang

dong dong23 said...

coach factory outlet
lebron james shoes 12
nike roshe flyknit
michael kors outlet
louis vuitton outlet
ugg italia
michael kors outlet
jordan 8s
dallas mavericks jerseys
true religion
abercrombie and fitch
louis vuitton outlet stores
canada goose jackets
adidas yeezy
cheap ray ban sunglasses
cleveland cavaliers jerseys
tommy hilfiger outlet
ed hardy clothing
louis vuitton bags
ugg outlet
jordan 6
coach outlet
christian louboutin outlet
nike air max
coach outlet
hogan scarpe
hermes handbags
gucci handbags
golden state warriors jerseys
polo shirts
coach factory outlet
gucci handbags
longchamp handbags
true religion jeans
louis vuitton outlet
ray ban sunglasses
christian louboutin outlet
kobe 11 shoes
louis vuitton handbags
michael kors purses
20169.2wengdongdong

chenmeinv0 said...

kate spade outlet
ugg boots
ugg outlet
the north face jackets
louis vuitton handbags
ray ban glasses
ugg boots sale
canada goose uk
nba jerseys
warriors jerseys
2016.11.11xukaimin

Bert Carl said...

MBT Fora Gtx Women
Adidas Neo
Timberland Chukka Boots
Adidas NMD
Nike Magista Obra IC
MBT Lami Damen
Adidas Messi 16.3 IC
Timberland 6 Inch Boots Herren
Nike ELASTICO Finale III Street TF
Adidas NMD C1

chenmeinv0 said...

longchamp pas cher
michael kors outlet online
mcm outlet
adidas stan smith
polo ralph lauren
tiffany jewelry
spurs jerseys
replica rolex watches
louis vuitton handbags
coach outlet online
2017.2.25xukaimin

raybanoutlet001 said...

ugg outlet
seattle seahawks jerseys
yeezy boost 350
abercrombie and fitch kids
ugg outlet
cheap uggs
patriots jerseys
toms shoes
coach outlet
ugg boots

Get "Un-Stuck" and Search Away