Sunday, October 24, 2010

"...how about me not blaming you for everything, how about me enjoying the moment for once..."

I'm in a decidedly weird mood today. Not bad, not good...just weird. I can't quite sum it up but I just feel "foggy" in my head. Like, a cloud is hovering above my eyes and causing pressure. See, didn't I mention that I was weird?

Anyways, this week has been the week of me going off on tirades. I don't know why but every now and then, I like to harp on a subject and pummel it into the ground. This week has been about the whole, people being bullied and not feeling good enough about themselves, etc. It's so odd because we are all such blatant products of a "first world" society. We have food, we have water, we have all of our necessities, so naturally, we turn to self-loathing. Do you think that someone in the middle of Uganda, who has no food for her child is worried about whether or not her ears are too big? It's because our world is too easy, so we have to make it difficult and turn on ourselves.

I have regular chats with myself and I try to tell myself not to be so hard on myself because I am so lucky but sometimes, you get caught in your own world. Your own bit of crazy overwhelms you.

Anyways, it is just me. I always want people to know that they don't need to be depressed. We all go through it and more so, we all have horrible things that happen to us but we cannot let those things define us. If they do, we are forever tainted and forced to live in the shadow of the hurt. Ok, enough pondering, time for sleep.

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