Sunday, March 22, 2009

", close your eyes, escape this town for a little while..."

The other day, I was watching a movie and there was a line in it that said, "In the end, the only thing that you really own is your story, I'm just trying to live a good one." A simple line but it kind of speaks volumes. No material possession will ever be worth more than the tales that you are able to share about your life. I just think that it is really important for you to go out and do something if you really want to do it. Coming to Australia was always something that sat within the pit of my stomach and I knew that my life would always feel lacking if I didn't come here. It wasn't an easy choice to hop an ocean and leave everything safe behind me but if I needed to move forward, I had to move on. I placed no expectations on this experience because I wanted to come with wide eyes and an open mind. I still don't know all the changes that have gone on within me because of this experience but I think that is something that will be learned in time. I will walk away and realize what I have learned as opposed to being in the moment and seeing it there. Over the past couple of weeks, I have felt myself slip into my old habits of anti-socialism and I am going to have to try and break that. It is so easy to just go home and feel comfortable but I need to force myself out there a bit. I did well when I first arrived but now that I have a structured work schedule, it makes me just want to fall in line and be super boring again. People always say, "We are all just a work in progress", but I wonder when that work is going to be complete. To me, the thing that moves me forward and holds me back at the same time, is the idea that there is always something more and always something missing. At what point does everything seem "right" or "ok"? I don't know that that exists and if it does, I feel like it would be fleeting. Again, time will tell.

(Walkway on Welham Street)


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