Sunday, February 8, 2009

"...you never said too much, but still you showed the way..."

Real talk time. This heat is getting to me. It is putting me into a bad mood and then topping it all off is the job hunt. Now, technically, I have only been jobless for five days because I worked remotely throughout January but I have been plugging away at this for a month now and I am growing bored with it all. I don't know what else I can do? So, I am just going to keep trying and let this journey work itself out. So, onto more thought provoking concepts. The other day, the Mom at the house where I am living was talking about how one of her daughters was being bullied at school and how she didn't want her to be insecure and it made me drift off into deep thought land. I was thinking about how every time we feel stupid, ugly, fat, unworthy, or any other negative emotion that it is because someone, at some point, told us that. Someone else let us know that we were not good enough. I don't believe that in life, I would have ever woken up and just looked in the mirror and bashed myself, if someone else hadn't done it for me already. I guess when having this thought, it kind of worked two ways. On one hand, we should never let others' perception of us hold us back. Even though stopping that emotion is probably the hardest thing to do. But, on the flip side, we need to always be aware of what we say and do to others because you may forget that moment but it can live on in someone's life for the rest of his/her life. I was thinking about a time in Middle School when someone was really mean to me and how I can recall his name, his face, the words he said, etc. but if I found him right now and walked up to him, he would never have a clue that he even had known me at some point in life. It's just kind of weird to think about, I guess. For me, I have this big hang-up that I want everyone to like me. I get that this may not be healthy but when I deal with you, I want you to leave the situation and think something positive about me. I don't ever want to be a burden on anyone or make people feel bad about themselves when they are around me. I am sure that I don't always get it right but I try. I was also thinking about how I came here to kind of chill out and take on a new perspective in life. As I was having this thought, I was making a list in my head of lessons that I hoped to learn and then had to tell myself that planning for future learned lessons was what I was trying to avoid doing! I was planning out what I would learn. I am trying to go with the flow. Again, trying! Ok, so in Aussie news, there are bush fires burning all over the South and 65 people have died. It is bad. The South is burning and the North is flooding. This is a crazy land. In the morning, I have an interview with a recruiter for another job. I remain cautiously optimistic. At this point, I will take anything because I am tired of having the burden of looking for work. Ok, this heat is forcing me to go to sleep. Again, I would like to write an open letter to the country of Australia and ask why air conditioning is so rare to find! I will never understand it.



8 comments:

a shi li said...

I think that everyone has that once person they remember who said something not nice to them. It's human nature to want to be liked. But don't worry, I like you :)

And I am such a dork!

nichole said...

As a mom and joella smith I really enjoyed reading this entry. What you said about bullying was very true and important.

Guo Guo said...

coach outlet store online
moncler jackets
michael kors outlet online
ralph lauren sale
michael kors outlet
canada goose sale
timberland outlet
tory burch outlet
celine bags
michael kors handbags
abercrombie store
abercrombie & fitch
abercrombie outlet
coach factory outlet
fitflop
ralph lauren outlet
hollister kids
michael kors
chi hair strighteners
michael kors purses
kate spade
coach outlet
wholesale nfl jerseys
burberry sale
ray ban glasses
bottega veneta bags
ugg boots
michael kors outlet
ugg outlet
polo ralph lauren online
marc jacobs outlet
gucci handbags
louis vuitton outlet
discount oakley sunglasses
p90x
abercrombie and fitch
replica rolex watches
hollister clothing store
kevin durant shoes 2014
ray ban outlet

Da Shuai Guo said...

4guowenhao0824
hollister uk
giuseppe zanotti
cheap snapbacks
kate spade handbags
links of london
rolex watches uk
rolex watches
hollister canada, http://www.hollistercanada.com
lacoste outlet
salomon running shoes
puma sneakers
los angeles clippers jerseys
the north face outlet
coach outlet
roshe run men
nfl jerseys
michael kors outlet
fitflop
babyliss pro
evening dresses
celine outlet online
ghd hair straighteners
swarovski crystal
coach factory outlet
air max 2015
nike roshe
tiffany and co
louis vuitton handbags
gucci
tiffany and co jewelry

Mu Lin said...

michael kors handbags outlet
louis vuitton artsy
coach handbags
michael kors hamilton tote
louis vuitton neverfull
coach sunglasses
mcm tote
louis vuitton neverfull mm
discount michael kors
longchamp outlet
longchamp le pliage large tote
michael kors outlet store
michael kors black purse
hermes purses
louis vuitton handbags on sale
chanel outlet
chanel flap bag
chanel tote
louis vuitton tote bag
coach purses on sale
mcm clutch
prada belts
burberry wallet
louis vuitton belts
gucci handbags
burberry for men
prada crossbody bags
louis vuitotn speedy
burberry outlet online
prada outlet online
prada messenger bag
mcm backpack
prada purses
gucci handbags outlet
coach messenger bag

Tory Burch Outlet said...

Kate Spade Outlet Toms Shoes Hermes Belt UGG Boots UGG Boots Outlet Louis Vuitton Outlet Louis Vuitton Store Outlet North Face Outlet Store North Face Outlet Store The North Face Outlet Louis Vuitton Outlet Louis Vuitton Handbags Louis Vuitton Outlet Timberland Boots Timberland Outlet Tory Burch Outlet Store Tory Burch Outlet Online Tory Burch Outlet Oakley Outlet
Michael Kors Outlet Ralph Lauren Outlet Gucci Factory Outlet Gucci Outlet Gucci Handbags Cheap Ray Ban Sunglasses North Face Jackets Prada Outlet Burberry Outlet Hollister Clothing Ferragamo Shoes Tiffany Jewelry Tiffany Outlet NFL Jerseys Cheap Jordans Oakley Outlet North Face Outlet

Cran Jane said...

Tory Burch Flats Marc Jacobs Handbags Jimmy Choo Shoes Jimmy Choos True Religion Outlet ED Hardy Outlet
Burberry Belt Tory Burch Boots Louis Vuitton Belt Ferragamo Belt Marc Jacobs Handbags Lululemon Outlet Christian Louboutin Shoes True Religion Outlet Tommy Hilfiger Outlet
Michael Kors Outlet Coach Outlet Red Bottoms Kevin Durant Shoes New Balance Outlet Adidas Outlet Coach Outlet Online Stephen Curry Jersey Vans Outlet Ralph Lauren Outlet
Ugg Boots Sale UGGS For Women Skechers Go Walk Adidas Yeezy Boost Adidas Yeezy Adidas NMD Coach Outlet North Face Outlet Ralph Lauren Outlet Puma Outlet Polo Outlet

eric yao said...

Coach Purses http://www.coachpurses.eu.com

Coach Outlet http://www.coachoutlet2016.us.com

Tory Burch Shoes http://www.toryburch-outlet.us.org

Longchamp Outlet http://www.longchampoutlet.in.net

Michael Kors Handbags http://www.innnov8.com

Coach Outlet http://www.innnovate.com

Red Bottom Shoes http://www.redbottomshoes.us.org

Moncler Jackets http://www.monclerdownjackets.us.com

North Face Outlet http://www.northfacestoreoutlet.in.net

Kate Spade Outlet http://www.katespadeoutletstore.us.com

Moncler Outlet http://www.moncleroutletonline.in.net

Coach Factory http://www.maganates.com

Coach Factory Outlet http://www.coachfactorysoutlet.in.net

Kate Spade Outlet http://www.katesapdeoutlet.us.org

Ray Ban Outlet http://www.raybanoutletstore.in.net

Christian Louboutin Shoes http://www.christianlouboutinshoes2016.in.net

North Face Outlet http://www.northfaceoutlets.us.org

Coach Factory Outlet http://www.coachoutletstore.name

Kate Spade Outlet http://www.katespadeoutletonline.name

Coach Outlet http://www.coach-outlets.us.org

Nike Roshe Run http://www.tanie-nikerosherun.pl

Buty Nike Air Max http://www.airmaxsprzedazdla.pl

Nike Air Max http://www.nikeairmax.us.org

Red Bottom Shoes http://www.redbottomshoe.in.net

Christian Louboutin Outlet http://www.christianlouboutinoutlet.us.org

Balenciaga Handbags http://www.balenciagaoutlets.us.com

Balenciaga Handbags http://www.balenciagahandbag.us.com

Kate Spade Outlet http://www.katespadefactoryoutlet.in.net

Toms Shoes http://www.tomshoesoutlet.us.com

Hermes Belt http://www.hermesbelt.us.com

Prada Outlet http://www.pradafactoryoutlet.com

Louis Vuitton Outlet http://www.louisvuittonsoutlet.us.com

North Face Outlet Store http://www.northfaceoutletstore.in.net

North Face Jackets http://www.north-face.in.net

North Face http://www.north-faceoutlets.us.com

Louis Vuitton Factory Outlet http://www.louisvuittonfactoryoutletstore.com

Louis Vuitton Outlet http://www.louisvuitton-outlets.us.org

Timberland Boots http://www.timberland-outlets.us.com

Cheap Timberland Boots http://www.timberlandoutlet.us.com

Tory Burch Outlet http://www.outlettoryburch.us.com

Michael Kors Outlet http://www.michaelkorsoutletusa.us.com

Ralph Lauren Outlet http://www.ralphlaurenstoreoutlet.us.com

Gucci Shoes http://www.guccifactoryoutlet.name

Gucci Outlet http://www.guccioutletco.us.com

North Face Jackets http://www.northfacefactoryoutlet.us.com

Prada Outlet http://www.pradaoutlets.in.net

Hollister Clothing http://www.hollister-clothing.us.com

Ferragamo Shoes http://www.ferragamoshoes.us.org

Tiffany Jewelry http://www.tiffanyandcooutlet.name

Tiffany Outlet http://www.tiffanycooutlet.us.com

NFL Jerseys http://www.nfljerseys.name

Toms Outlet http://www.outlettoms.us.com

Cheap Jordans http://www.cheapjordans.eu.com

North Face Outlet http://www.thenorthfaceoutlet.us.org

Michael Kors Outlet http://www.michael-korsoutletstores.us.com

Prada Handbags http://www.pradaoutlet.us.org

Chan Luu Sale http://www.chanluu.us.com

Toms Outlet http://www.tomsoutletstores.us.com

Kate Spade Outlet http://www.katespadeoutletonline.us.org

Beats By Dr Dre http://www.beatsbydrdre.us.org

Coach Outlet http://www.coachstoreoutlet.us.org

Christian Louboutin Shoes http://www.christianlouboutinshoe.eu.com

Valentino Shoes http://www.valentinoshoes.eu.com

Michael Kors Outlet http://www.michaelkorsoutlet.us.org

Coach Factory Outlet http://www.coachfactoryoutlet.us.org

Coach Outlet Online http://www.coachoutletonlinestore.us.org

Coach Purses http://www.coachpurse.us.com

Kate Spade Outlet http://www.katespadefactoryoutlet.us.com

Toms Shoes http://www.tomoutlet.us.com

Louis Vuitton http://www.louisvuitton-outletstores.us.com

Get "Un-Stuck" and Search Away